Moving on .

I've been blogging for a few years now. Sometimes sporadically sometimes daily, but almost regularly. I have finally separated from XSU and starting to live a new life on my own. The original blog helped me get through the painful process of the end of the marriage, along with some bumpy roads dealing with a critically ill child in the midst of the end of marriage mess. Now this blog will see me through the new paths and adventures that life has to offer. Restructuring my life. My way. My experiences, ventings, musings on that whole big and not so big deal.

September 28, 2009


This single parenting thing is exhausting.  I didn't think it would be as bad but with an exchange student in the house - two 16 year old girls are keeping me busy.  Gotta admit though, it's better than two toddlers, or worse, four kids or whatever most single parents have to cope with.

RJ has been with me since the split.  She's only been at SXU's while I was away - and there is a story.

While I was in Norway - RJ had the audacity to throw a party - in my house - with alcohol and about 15 kids - of which at least half stayed over night.  She told XSU she was staying at a friend's and he of course, didn't bother verifying it on a land line.  It wasn't hard to figure out she had a bash as rather than cleaning up after herself she left a huge mess in the kitchen.  I had spent half the night before I left putting the house in order so it would be all calm and good when I returned.  The assault that hit me when I walked in made me scream with fury.  And she didn't bother cleaning up because - she knew the consequences would be minimal if any.

When I told XSU what had happened - he thought I was exaggerating.  She lied about where she was, she lied about what she did and she most certainly broke trusts on so many levels.  He brought the girls back and I made him look around the place to see what had happened.

The best he could come up with was to take away her camera.  I turned off her phone after I was done with my first bit of primal scream therapy.

Laptop was dicey.  I couldn't remember the password for the wireless network - roll eyes - so couldn't change that.    I am still working on that.

She also had to come straight home every day with SXU and no outside activities allowed after school.  However, again this past weekend there were more parties - and XSU allowed her to to.  I would have said no. BUT she was not at my house.

Better even, XSU took away her key to his house.  She claims she never needed a key to get into my house because the door was left unlocked.  Totally NOT possible.  It doesn't matter any way since I am under renovations and the doors and locks are being replaced in the next couple of weeks.


Anonymous said...

Damn. WTF is this "parenting" he does? Oh. Never mind. We know he doesn't parent. He is too busy playing the part of the good guy/disneyland dad.

Why would he take away the key to your house? Doesn't she live there? Perhaps it would just be better to KNOW where she is. Oh. Never mind. {refer back to good guy/disneyland dad comment}

I feel for ya girl. I remember many nights being so freakin exhausted and looking around for someone to take over for me. Alas,there was no one around so, like you, I had to suck it up and keep going.

Hang in there. Love the new digs.

~ blondie

p.s. my word ver is very apropos: *blessess* - In spite of it all we are indeed blessed.

MarieA said...

oops - sorry - not clear. XSU took away RJ's key for XSU's house - not my house. He doesn't want her trashing his place. But it's not as if he ever goes anywhere anyway that she would have the opportunity any way.

Blessings indeed!

Anonymous said...

Tee Hee. I think it is just that the blonde is living up to her name. It clearly says his house. I will blame it on a severe lack of coffee. That's my story anyways.

~ b

Lily on the Road said...

He reneges on a key to his place, do tell the lawyer!

You had to know there would be an issue when you were away, these kids have been running their own show for awhile now. RJ has to face reality, big time....she is old enough to take on her own responsibility, paying for
c)bus passes (ya right)
d)food in the house

MarieA said...

oh believe me Lily, I've already told her a J-O-B will become necessary for what ever it is she wants. I've told both girls, that both their dad and I have half the income and double the bills so they do need to pitch in.