Hello Good bye to the red cars.

Good Bye Taurus.............. Hello Hyundai.... singing a Sonata.......
The first car I ever bought on my own A brand new car with only 27 kilometres on it. I negotiated, researched, shopped, and decided ON. MY. OWN. I will be inhaling new car smell for the next year. Oh, and please take your shoes and boots off before getting in would you?


I would have loved the Genesis Coupe, but really, after two test drives, the turbo charged speediness of it and lightweight ride wasn't comfortable for me. And the sedan is way too rich for my blood.
Too bad. And the Mustang. Still a gas guzzler. I'll rent one once in a while and get that out of my system. I now don't have to get into a car and panic in case I forgot my phone. This car isn't going to need oil every time I fuel up, and it probably won't cost me $50 a week to run either. Ahhhh relief.

Bye bye Taurus. 1999 was a good year. 247,000 kilometres later.... you're definitely ready for the wreaking ball.

Leaving the cougar behind

There's something to be said for sharing food Tapas style. My favourite restaurant in my little town is a fabulous tapas bar where the menu and wine list change often. I love the place and have spent many hours there with many friends to the point that the manager knows me and greets me by name.

This past Sunday I had the best time ever with VNN. We went out for a movie and dinner. The King's Speech and tapas. I would have liked to have seen True Grit being the true blue Coen Brothers fan that I am but agreed to the Firth film and was not at all disappointed. Firth has finally left Mr Darcy in the dust.

Then it was tapas time. VNN had a wine flight with his share of the food. Red wine. Not my thing at all. Now interestingly, I could certainly smell the difference in the wines, but they all three tasted like..... red wine. He thought that was pretty funny, and couldn't understand how I couldn't tell the difference. It's a flaw no doubt. Oddly though, my scotch tasting palate is much more well defined, which he appreciates.

The intimacy of sharing plates of food and enjoying glasses of wine just made for a fabulously lovely evening. We shared food, talked, stole a kiss or two, held hands and just *really* enjoyed each other's company. I can totally feel myself starting to fall for this man. He has a presence and a style as well as an ability to just be in the moment with me. I am kind of overwhelmed by all that. And so totally not used to it at all.

And to think I wanted to date someone ten years younger than me. Well, there's certainly nothing wrong with being the "younger" woman instead of the cougar I thought I wanted to be. Nothing at all.

Restructuring and Rebuilding. A Review.

I am off work this week. And it's gonna be HOT and HUMID all week long. I have a bunch of errands to run this week - dog to the vet, passport renewal, RJ wants to see an exhibit at the Art Gallery, moving some stuff around, more picture hanging - drilling holes in walls, etc. It's going to be a good week.

We went to the beach yesterday. It was a perfect day. Not a cloud in the sky and a little cooler than the city.

I started to read the second Larson book - not sure I am going to read it - I really don't like that violent suspense filled tension and creepy stuff. Much prefer a good murder police procedural.

Did I mention I made strawberry jam last weekend? I haven't made jam in years because we were always going to camp when strawberries were at their peak. I was downtown in the Market last weekend and there were some really luscious Quebec berries so I bought a large flat and made about 12 quarts of jam. Already gave away two. It's sweet but oh so yummy. We've been eating strawberry shortcake all week too.



I got through the wedding anniversary date. I completely forgot until two days later. I guess that's progress. I also didn't remember the day XSU left. I still get angry about that day, but it's tempered quite a bit now. I do tell the story whenever I can, particularly to people who know the XSU, petty I suspect but it's therapy.

CBC Radio has been playing an excellent excellent documentary series about divorce. Five hours all together in thirty minute shows. And this is public readio folks - no commercials. It discussed everything from initial break up, adultery, feelings and emotions, the immigrant experience ( oy!) children of divorce, and more. It was very informative. They can't put it into a podcast because of the music they used (not good thinking, but that's a quibble) The series is called ASUNDER. I highly recommend listening. ( for some reason again Blogger isn't highlighting the word ASUNDER the link is embedded - go for it) There are a variety of experiences, kids and adult children talk about their parents break up, the tumultuous variety of emotions, and some serious bad behavior was worth it. There will be something in this series for anyone who has gone through this. I was able to relate to some segments quite well, and some moments that made me think, thank goodness my experience wasn't *that* bad! There are some really wacky, nasty people out there. Makes my idea of revenge or vengeance look like amateur hour.

It appears I am restruturing not too badly.

New Year

A new year. 

Take down the old calendar from the wall, put up the new one. Mark the important dates to come. Think of the possibilities and plans for the year. 

My friend in Denmark has invited me to come for her youngest daughter`s confirmation in May. Seriously. Denmark for a confirmation. That would be worth saving my pennies. 

Watching the Rose Bowl Parade again as I have almost every year since I can remember thinking how much I really want to go see the parade live.  And not just watching from any where but I want to be where the tv cameras are to see all the performances. If you go - then go big! Last year I looked at the tour packages for the parade - foot ball game included`and thought `I really need to get on this and go! I`d give away the tickets for the game and go shopping - but then again, maybe I`d go to a game just because it`s something to do.

I need to keep writing my murder mysteries. I have about 6 outlines and a bunch of research done, plus back stories and maybe a little discipline is called for and it`s time to get that ball going. 

No.... these are not resolutions but thoughts and things I have been contemplating. A new year, a new page to be turned. Time to move on and reach ahead to the possibilities rather than turning around at what was and reliving that over and over again.

Good health happiness  and possibilities to all.

Happily Not Unmarried!

My team and I at work went out for lunch yesterday.  Thai – very yummy – a little too spicy for me, but… oh wait… I am digressing again.

During the meal one of my coop students asked me during the course of a conversation whether or not I’d get remarried.

First of all, I never officially discussed my marriage, separation or other personal woes with the team.  None of their business, I barely missed work, and after all the stuff they dealt with during Rebel’s trials, I didn’t subject them to more of my drama.

Secondly, some of them were in the picture – those who must be well connected with people I do talk to – and good on them, however my full timers knew nothing.  THAT was interesting.

I kept that pretty low key and didn’t delve into any details except to say that indeed my marriage broke down and I was now separated.  My one loyal employee asked about the girls, I responded and left it at that.   Okay, she brushes her hands off and says, done with that bit of news and now let’s move on.

Oh!  The original question.  Remarry?  Honey, I am not even UN-married yet never mind thinking about tying that particular knot again.   And then there is the entire annulment process to get through, so the thought of going down THAT road again is certainly not on my radar.   The question came from a lovely student, one who is a little older than most.  She has to be in her late 30s maybe early 40s.  Never married from what I do know about her, but went through a fairly serious relationship and break up a few years ago.

Apparently she has been seeing someone – someone that I do know is not an entirely trustworthy or appropriate individual.  This I do know for a fact.  She is not facing up to the realities of this person and repercussions of the being with him because she needs to be with someone so badly.  It’s a bad scene all way around.

The point being – I don’t particularly want to be married again, I don’t think  For now anyway. Although having seen the difference on pension splitting and the financial side of marriage in old age, I might be persuaded.

However, I also think a companion a la Jackie Kennedy style would be nice – and not that Greek style either, more than man she was with when she died. They each had their own homes, and spent time together and time apart, took vacations and spent holidays together. I kinda like that idea.

Right now though, I am enjoying myself and my time on my own. I don’t want to be one of those women with that hungry look every time a potential companion hits the room.  Unless of course he’s a lanky 35 yr old healthy specimen – then it’s cougar time and all bets are off.   But until then I’ll remain not unmarried, happily separated cocooning in my little space enjoying the life and blessings I have.

Restructuring: Life after marriage ends.

The end of the marriage has begun. It would seem that I really should move on and the spousalennuie needs to be done. From now on it is restructuring time.

And wow am I restructuring. I am starting with foundations. The basement rec room. I've had it completely gutted and and am rebuilding it from the cement walls - got rid of the nasty panelling and it is being replaced with gyprock. Rebel Junior would like the walls painted a shade of yellow. I can go with that. I want her to be able to spend time here with her friends and be comfortable and if the colour of the room helps make a difference so be it.

My personal restructuring has also begun. I've changed all my " emergency contacts" at work. I have a good friend from church up on first and and she has my two brothers up on her list. I've kept them all in that loop. That was a big one.