DogUrDay kind of Day today

Can you tell I am counting down the days until I go to my first ( and probably only) NASCAR race weekend. I am totally excited. The track, the noise, the aroma of fuel, the red necks, the 6 free beers ( per day) that go with my tickets - yep but it's Coors - may as well be drinking water! It's going to be a damn fine time. I am so pumped for this event.

And then there will be the shopping in our spare time. We'll be going through Syracuse - Target heaven, AND outlet malls supreme. I thought about finding the Coach store, but these purses are so ubiquitous that I am thinking Kate Spade instead. Does she have outlet stores yet? You don't see too many Kate Spade bags in my end of the world.

So the SI joint pain has started up again. I haven't started in on physio therapy yet, but that will probably start on Monday if I can't get the pain under control. I don't have the exercise plan any longer, so for that and some acupuncture treatments - would be worth it. It's been two summers since my last bout. And I am talking about my aches and pains. Roll eyes. Totally going middle aged nuts. But it's not pleasant. I saw the doctor and got the full strength naproxin- Aleve just wasn't cutting it!

I've been enjoying the relative tranquility since Rebel moved out. RebelJunior doesn't seem to be causing too much havoc. I've got her going on a plane to visit her grandparents and XSU will pick her up there and she'll come back with him.

I am heading to a friend's for dinner this evening. She wants me to bring one of my appetizers that I only usually make at Christmas time. LOL How could I say no? It's easy and I always have these ingredients in house.

In the meantime, we've got Blondie with her Caturday posts so I thought I'd make mine a DogurDay. I know I know... doesn't quite work.

Sighes and leaving the nest

Rebel is once again moving in with the BF of hers on the other side of the river. What it comes down to with her is she doesn't want to be in my house - or her father's house, she just wants to be independent and not have to follow anyone's rules but her own.

I get that, having done it myself albeit before I was 22 and going to grad school in another city. I too recall wanting to move into an apartment with a girlfriend only to have BOTH my mother and grandma on my case asking me about bills, furniture, school and forcing me to cave to their demands. I can still hear the two of them - one on either side of me grilling me on my lack of thought, on how was I going to study. It was a conversation in Ukrainian that went something like this:

"Ma - you know what she wants to do? She wants to leave home and go live in an apartment!"
and grandma responds -
"An apartment? Why? what are you doing you don't want your mother to know about eh?"
"Nothing Baba - I want to get out on my own that's all."
"Go ahead ma, ask her how she's going to pay rent and utilities?"
"Nu Marie, how are you going to pay the rent? you go to university. You have to study."
"I work already two nights a week I'll just work on weekends too."
"Weekends? You go to church on Sunday, and you have to study. You're going to work now? OY!"
"That's right ma, she wants her independence. How much rent are you going to pay? You want independence, I'll give you independence. I'll charge you rent and you can have your independence, how's that."
" Good idea Marushka. Charge your own daughter rent and she can live here and be independent."
"It's not the same mom, and you know it. Just because you lived at home until you got married doesn't mean I am going to do that too."
"OF COURSE your mother lived at home. Where else do nice girls live? Downtown? in apartments? What's wrong with you child, don't you know nice girls don't live in apartments."

On and on they went til they wore me down. Okay, I am not that ancient that nice girls didn't live in apartments. But even then I had a union job part time, a decent room mate and it would have been walking distance to university downtown. But no go. And right she was - it would have been difficult but then again who knows how things would have worked. I just couldn't disobey my mother at that point. I NEVER spoke to my mother the way my daughters speak to me. NOT ever. Two year later though, I was off to the east coast for more university and had my independence.

But my Rebel girl isn't there yet. Her BF, the useless, loser, lying, jackass, has no job and does work for cash while he waits for his so-called "union" job which I am quite sure is more bull cacky than a bull produces in a month. I do not see how he can possibly afford Rebel AND her dog.

I listened in on a conversation Rebel had with her Dad, ( eavesdropping is not a crime when your children are involved so don't judge me!) and I have to admit, it appears he is finally growing balls when it comes to dealing with her and BF. He finally told her again he wants her to live at his place while he's gone to visit his parents. He knows if she moves in the BF will follow, but I said to him, what do you care as long as he is not there when you get back, what are you going to do about that. At least he might cut the lawn while you're gone!

He also point blank asked her what her BF is doing for a job to support her and I don't think she really did have a good answer. In talking with someone who Rebel trusts, she told me that really - deep down Rebel knows her BF is a useless,loser, lying, jackass and she will only take so much more before she is done.

She says because Rebel has lived a pretty cushy life and has had whatever she wants, heart transplant notwithstanding, she will NOT like living with BF who has no cash to spare, who has no understanding for anything intellectual has no ambition and she will tire of it. The cracks are there. So I will need to back off. And hope that in the process, he doesn't do her too much damage. I believe she worries about being alone, about not finding anyone and he reinforces this. Not much I can do except tell her she can return home anytime,( with certain guidelines that must be respected).

In the meantime, I have to go and pick up the mess she left behind in my rec room and her bedroom. sigh.... not the way I would like to move on and have her leave the nest, but leave the nest she has..... again.