Moving on .

I've been blogging for a few years now. Sometimes sporadically sometimes daily, but almost regularly. I have finally separated from XSU and starting to live a new life on my own. The original blog helped me get through the painful process of the end of the marriage, along with some bumpy roads dealing with a critically ill child in the midst of the end of marriage mess. Now this blog will see me through the new paths and adventures that life has to offer. Restructuring my life. My way. My experiences, ventings, musings on that whole big and not so big deal.

July 28, 2010

Wordy Wednesday: A Heluva Story.

Wordless Wednesday is cancelled today because I just don't have access to my internet and no way to get images from point A to B. Unless Blondie inserts a very nice Ford Roush Racing NASCAR image! (-:

{as you wish. And it's even a Mustang!}

So instead I will let you in on a good one. An acquaintance of mine - the CEO of a youth at risk organisation where I sit on the board- knows Rebel quite well. The two ran into each other somewhere and Dierdra mentioned that I was going to a NASCAR race - in 9 days I might add!

Well! Rebel had a fit. She's decided there must be a man involved because no way would I ever spring to go to a NASCAR race. bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha. She said something to RJ and the two of them were grilling me over the table at dinner. It was too much fun.
"Who's the man?"
"There is no man."
"There has to be a man. Why else would YOU be going to a NASCAR race? Say pickle"
Apparently if you say the word pickle and start to smile or giggle it means you're lying. I guffawed quite loudly as I said the magic word which set the girls off even more.

Yeah.... I lied. There IS a man going. The husband of my friend, and no, there is no three way activity involved. (saving that for Rudy & Blondie and the camera) In fact, there are moments when I worry about my sanity for this trip because the friend I am going with is, to be blunt, an alcoholic. She is a wino but manages to be functional. She manages to hold down a job, but as she progresses and takes on stress - the drinking usually gets so bad she has to quit working. It hasn't happened now for about 5 years and she's almost due to crash again.

I asked her if she really thought she could do the trip and it seems she is all up for it. There are moments when she and her husband are sparring partners and then he enables her problem. However, I had a few frank words with the two of them, and I believe we have an understanding. So I will hope and pray for the best. It was her idea to start with, and I resisted, but then thought life is too short. I really think her life is going to be shortened - she's diabetic, smokes, drinks and rarely eats. This isn't a good combo.

But we are off to NASCAR and my girls are thinking I am having a dirty weekend. They are all for it and want to know 9 ways to Sunday "who" would take the likes of me to a NASCAR weekend. No doubt this is the message that will be sent to XSU. I roar in laughter, and not just your standard LOL!

The road to Watkins Glen is going to be a heluva ride!

July 27, 2010

Ever have one of these days?

Work most of the day was all right. Just as I was up to full staff though two people went down again. That I’m used to. It’s the home front stuff that makes me crazy.

Arrived home from work last night and every kitchen cupboard door was open. The patio door wasn’t locked, the tv was on in the basement and RJ was nowhere to be found.

I tried to use the telephone to call a friend and let her know I’d be late to see Midsummer’s Night Dream at the park and damn Rogers home phone… NOT WORKING. Neither was the internet Forty minutes later – no resolution and chances of either being fixed before FRIDAY was unlikely. No no no I told them that was unacceptable service. I was told I’d get a phone call first thing Tuesday morning. I missed my window to get out of the house and to the park where the play was on – a 40 minute ride away. Couldn’t call my friend because even though she has a cell phone she never uses it so it’s rarely turned on.

By 11:30 am today Tuesday, still no call from Rogers so I had to call back and yet again go through the routine, name, address, postal code, mother’s maiden name, blah blah repeat the story , check your file, and finally - an appointment during the proverbial noon and 7 PM time slot on Wednesday.

In the meantime I guess I will hit the library for my Facebook fix and whatever else I need the webs for this evening.

I took Bell’s name in vain. I think I am going to switch my home phone back to Bell. I am paying a whack of money a month and no service is making me a tad cranky. On the upside I finished reading a book that has been sitting by the bedside because I’ve been wasting time online.

So I am breaking my wine habit, now I am forced to break my internet habit, and maybe that’s all a good thing. Perhaps I will actually read another book this evening since the library closes at 8:30 and my internet fix will have to be done.

A story for another day. How I caught RJ in a lie when she told me she was going to a friend’s house, didn’t want me to drive her and I lay in waiting at her father’s house and was not disappointed. When I called XSU and told him RJ was in the house against his wishes his response “what am I supposed to do about that?” Seriously dude. Put your daddy hat on !

July 23, 2010

Friday Fantasy: snoops

Rebel called me and asked me to pick her up some milk on my way home. She was staying at XSU's house tonight and RJ was also there. I had to pick her up and bring her home.

The point is - I had to go *IN* XSU's house. I WAS going to put the Google street view right here so you could catch the outside of the place but decided not to be a complete Bee-yatch. I have a fantasy of walking around and snooping my brains out. Then I could post pictures of the inside instead. This could only happen of course, after cutting a key to his house which I would have to take from one of RJ's many bags and hope she doesn't figure out what I've done. It would be kind of fun to wander through the place and see what's what in there. ( wearing surgical gloves of course so I don't leave finger prints anywhere. Frankly, I'm surprised RJ even has a key. BUT I am not supposed to know about it.

The glance I had in the living room was nearly enough. The man is totally living like a bachelor in a bad pad. Blankets on the huge floor to ceiling picture window, mismatched furniture that doesn't work, (where did he get that stuff) and a carpet that should have been ripped out before he even moved in. And I have the fancy shmancy Electrolux vacuum cleaner - for the hard wood floors that regularly need heavy duty vacuuming.. bwa ha ha

Of course being a regular reader of mysteries and murders this snooping could only take place after dark, with my car parked a mile away and not recognizable. Or would the neighbours notice? Naw, XSU has probably not even talked to his neighbours. He never did while he lived with me, he wouldn't change patterns now. I'd be dressed in all black clothes - and would brazenly walk in and have a look see. Or, perhaps I should be even more brazen and walk in during the day. My car has been there often enough so that it wouldn't be unusual. Though why leave my license plate exposed like that. I'd have to plan a quick escape just in case Rebel were to walk in while I was there. Hmmm must find out when she's at work so that scenario doesn't happen. That would just cause tremendous grief. For me.

The goal wouldn't be to take anything or vandalize, just poke around and see what the deal is. Because I could. But as I say. It's a fantasy. That's all.

July 22, 2010

13 on Thursday

What's left in the house now that the ECO-Audit is done
1 add cupboards on one wall in kitchen. Glass doors
2 change the door pulls and drawer pulls in kitchen
3 light ballasts under cupboards up graded
4 paint the kitchen
5 paint powder room
6 refresh paint in bathroom
7, 8 re do bath room counter tops both bathrooms
9 new faucet in kitchen XSU took the one he planned to put in with him. seriously.
10 buy curtains for living room
11 get the dining room table re finished.
12 new chairs for dining room
13 have dinner parties.. 1st one? perogy party with grad school friends in town next weekend.

July 18, 2010

Sunday Snippets

Sunday - a pretty quiet day around here. And a lovely one. The heat has dissipated and I threw open the windows in every single room in the house and had a breeze through the second floor. I realized my second floor windows - which slide open can be open on either side - either left or right. I never realized this before today.

Rebel came over to the house looking for money, and cold medication. It seems her BF can't afford to buy this for her. She also asked to take some food from the pantry. I don't have to say anything - one of her friends was doing it for me. After that Rebel took a nap in her old room before leaving with her care packages. She seems to like her job at the gym so that's good.

Apparently XSU was opining on my lack of budgeting skills because I wouldn't give Rebel cash so she went to him. (of course she did) I told Rebel that what I did with my money or lack of it was none of her father's business since he decided to leave and gave up his right to tell me what to do with my life. She was surprised for some reason. Well think about it, I told her, why do I care what an ex husband has to say? He didn't care enough to help manage finances when we were married so why would I care what he thinks after he's left? Even more surprising - she agreed with me. Today. Tomorrow will be another day.

I start a new job on Monday. It's the first time that I am changing jobs and staying in the same organization. I am moving from a real office to a cube in a room without windows. I still haven't completely cleared out my office and organized it for the person coming in. There was no pressure since I wasn't actually leaving the place. I am really looking forward to just doing a "job" rather than managing people, dealing with budgets, strategic plans and crap. It will be a tough job but it will be good fun.

July 17, 2010

DogUrDay kind of Day today

Can you tell I am counting down the days until I go to my first ( and probably only) NASCAR race weekend. I am totally excited. The track, the noise, the aroma of fuel, the red necks, the 6 free beers ( per day) that go with my tickets - yep but it's Coors - may as well be drinking water! It's going to be a damn fine time. I am so pumped for this event.

And then there will be the shopping in our spare time. We'll be going through Syracuse - Target heaven, AND outlet malls supreme. I thought about finding the Coach store, but these purses are so ubiquitous that I am thinking Kate Spade instead. Does she have outlet stores yet? You don't see too many Kate Spade bags in my end of the world.

So the SI joint pain has started up again. I haven't started in on physio therapy yet, but that will probably start on Monday if I can't get the pain under control. I don't have the exercise plan any longer, so for that and some acupuncture treatments - would be worth it. It's been two summers since my last bout. And I am talking about my aches and pains. Roll eyes. Totally going middle aged nuts. But it's not pleasant. I saw the doctor and got the full strength naproxin- Aleve just wasn't cutting it!

I've been enjoying the relative tranquility since Rebel moved out. RebelJunior doesn't seem to be causing too much havoc. I've got her going on a plane to visit her grandparents and XSU will pick her up there and she'll come back with him.

I am heading to a friend's for dinner this evening. She wants me to bring one of my appetizers that I only usually make at Christmas time. LOL How could I say no? It's easy and I always have these ingredients in house.

In the meantime, we've got Blondie with her Caturday posts so I thought I'd make mine a DogurDay. I know I know... doesn't quite work.

July 15, 2010

13 on Thursday

I threw the daughter's BF out of the house This is how he handled it - by leaving me a list of all the very important chores he took on which are supposed to make me feel grateful for his freeloading in my home.

TITLED: I don’t want him in my effing house

  1. Clean windows - didn't ask you to do it but thanks
  2. Fix car - see no.1
  3. Landscaping - see no.1
  4. Trimmed trees - see no.1
  5. Fixed car 2x - see no.1
  6. Cut grass - see no.1
  7. Put bicycles etc in shed - didn't want them in the shed - they are for recycling. thanks for nothing.
  8. Unwrapped air conditioner - that was a tough job and btw? Where is the wrapper?
  9. Cleaned up entire flood from hot water tank - ummm vacuumed with the shop vac that is STILL sitting in my basement.
  10. Organized basement - ummm moved things around. There is no "organization."
  11. Removed garbage from new couches - ummm you mean the cardboard boxes that I threw into the recycle bins?
  12. Changed light bulbs in hallway. - seriously?!
  13. Turned on fan in hall way - yep.. because the coat hanger trick was another tough one, and I had to change the direction of the fan after I told him it was the wrong speed.

Here's my list.

Thrown out because:
  1. Didn't pay a penny of rent. None
  2. Didn't buy groceries. Not once
  3. Put a car in my garage that wasn't running and still isn't.
  4. Seemed to believe that he was "entitled" to be in the house.
  5. For cryin out loud, he's 31 years old and freeloading.
  6. Didn't seem to be able to hold down a job.
  7. And when he did have a job, never worked a full week. Not once.
  8. Didn't like how he spoke to Rebel. Seemed to believe that she was there to serve his needs. Particularly laundry and meals. AS IF!
  9. Would smoke in my garage after I told him I didn't want him smoking in my garage. Not cigarettes or anything else. EVER!
  10. Found pot in my house and flushed it. heh heh heh
  11. 12, 13. He's loser, lying, sleezy, lazy, lacklustre excuse of a man-boy and I just didn't want him around any longer. I can always find someone else to change lightbulbs and turn fans on. Roll eyes.

July 05, 2010

Fuzziness and yellow tans's hot out there over 100 with the humidex and UV at 10! And it's going to be there all week. And it would be the first year I'm not at camp. The last couple of years I swear we were wearing parkas at night it was so cold and this year.... hot hot hot. ah well.

So I am working on my white legs. If I could liposuction and change anything about me besides the never ending acne or the two missing teeth it would be my legs. I have fat knees. And whiteness.

Did I mention I am also covered in little red dots and moles? ( gads you'd think I was the witch from Hansel and Gretel or something!) so as I douse myself in SPF 80 sun screen my little Rebel Junior is practically slathering herself in butter and frying outside. She compares herself and her sister to me and the grandmoms - I got your figure and Rebel has dad's upper body and grandma's skinny legs. I have bigger boobs than you - it's true she does - and everyone says Rebel looks like you... I have your crooked big toe.

So I told them both to take a good look and they'll see themselves in 30 or 40 years. They shudder, laugh hysterically and then go back to texting on their cell phones.

Back to the white legs. So all to say I don't sit outside and tan any more but I am forever looking for the goopy tan in a bottle. Why is it that the first time every season I put the stuff on, I end up with these patchy yellowy jaundiced looking hands rather than nice golden legs? Tonight as I sat on the phone yakking with a friend from camp days - our "director" - I looked in mortification wondering if the rest of the world noticed my yellowness. Is yellowness better than white legs that scream "she never leaves the house to do anything out of doors!"? ummm yes... it is.
I just have to find the right goopy tan in a bottle. Clearly I am not there yet. I do know that the cheaper the bottle the goopier and more yellow things are. That is not a good thing.

Somehow I just got roped into paying for Rebel Junior's plane trip to Nova Scotia. one way. She'll be coming back with XSU. Now why isn't he paying for this? I think I traded something but the Neo Citran and scotch must be fuzzing things out. More on this one another time. AS long as she is out of the city when I get away for the weekend.

July 04, 2010

Sunday Snippetts

Happy 4th of July to my legions of American readers! Hope you're all having a wonderful carefree holiday.
I love visiting your country. Nothing like Target, Nordstrom's, and really great hot dogs at the ball park to allow a girl to enjoy "foreign culture!"

I have a cold and feel miserable today. I am sure I'll get over it. The coughing and stuffed nose are more than I can put up with on a hot hot day, So I am watching this bizarre Christopher Walking Brendan Fraser movie about a family that lived in some kind of bunker because they thought there was some nuclear blast. Brendan Fraser comes out of the bunker at age 35 and hits the modern world ... very back to the future but not as good.

Had a good day with Rebel Junior and two of her friends at the beach yesterday. Went up to the church camp and have to admit that knowing my camp cooking days are done made me more than a little wistful. The memories of all the kids and parents hanging out playing capture the flag, having the crazy Olympics and great bonfires brought the point home - the kids are growing up. We gave them some great memories and I am happy about that. It doesn't look like anyone is taking over camp from us. No one stepped up so no camp this year. sigh... I really loved camp. There is talk of getting together for a reunion weekend - will see if we can arrange something this summer.

Rebel has moved most of her stuff to the Loser BF's place - some where on the other side of the river. We dropped her off yesterday on the way to the lake but she wouldn't let me take her to the door. Seriously. I don't know where she lives. Not sure how long this will last.

The Loser BF came by on Friday evening to pick up some stuff from the garage. I asked him when the car would leave my garage - not his mustang but another car he bought and then did nothing about it. I reminded him that he told me a month ago it would be gone in a week, and it's still taking up space. I told him he had a few more days before I had it towed to his father's house. HA! That set him off. I think he muttered something about being psycho....

XSU is off to visit his family for 6 weeks and leaving his house unattended. I am hoping that RJ has a key and plans to party there when she's claiming she 's sleeping over at a friends. Apparently RJ is being flown to meet him there when she's done summer school, but as usual, I have no details. I will have to get on his case tomorrow to find out what his plans are. I am not sure he actually has plans.

I am off to go get a Neo Citran and more orange juice and ColdFX.
Whew it's hot outside.

July 02, 2010

Neighbours and Ghosts

Buttons the dog and I went for a walk on Canada Day and had a chat with one of the neighbours. I used to ride the bus with him daily before I changed jobs and he retired. He and his wife were going to sell their house shortly after but never did. I wondered about that but wasn't sure what happened. Every now and again I'd see them on the porch or driving by and would wave.

Well today I found out as we chatted that his wife died rather suddenly during the winter. I was shocked. Never knew. I looked up her obituary and saw that it was quite small, and not a lot written about her. I swear I am going to write my own obituary and put it somewhere where my family can find it. It seems to sad to not remark on who someone was during their life . Just the facts and nothing else? Who were they? What was their passion? But these teeny obituaries are so sad I find.

I digress.

I always thought if I was ever to get involved with someone - a wife long gone, or even just gone, would be preferential to dealing with an ex. Call me weird. Or worse, someone who'd never been married - unless he was 30 ish and had great abs, because a good set of abs would not be too shabby... - oh...

I digress again.

And look what falls into my lap? A widower five doors away. Two daughters gone from the nest - he is a grandad and he tells me one daughter calls him every day driving him nuts asking if he ate dinner. Apparently she comes by and does the white glove test to see how clean his house his. (note to self don't invite her over!) So... do I ask him to to Bluesfest or Chamber Fest? I recall he used to listen to opera on his mp3 player. Maybe just a movie. We both like good beer and scotch too, and really, isn't this all that is needed to build a relationship? Booze, music and eventually the booze loosens you up and neither of us has to drive..... and what a great way to get the other neighbours wagging their tongues.

A neighbour, memories of a good marriage with a lovely wife, gone - no negative baggage. I even know for a fact that he had a very good relationship with his own dad. He's a bit older than XSU, but really doesn't look it - at all. House paid, good pension - and the possibility of .... a good scotch once in awhile.

yeah.... that's the ticket. As long as the ghost of his wife doesn't haunt this could become interesting.

July 01, 2010

13 on Thursday

13 reasons I love my country
(click on the different colour since I can't seem to make the hyperlink show up!)

1 open prairie skies
2 the concept of multiculturalism - even if it doesn't always work in practice being Ukrainian Canadian is who I am and learning who others are helps be open minded I would hope.
3 bilingualism - even if it doesn't always work in practice - it doesn't hurt to speak more than one language and appreciate and understand the history of our beginnings
4 poutine - from the chip truck or in a gourmet restaurant
5 the CBC in all it's formats
6 how others perceive us - people the world over usually smile when you tell them you're Canadian
7 sea to sea to sea - the variety, the beauty, the differences - see 1, 2, and 3
8 speaking my mind
9 a justice system that usually works
10 seasons - usually 4 but in many places called winter and construction season
11 police and security forces who are not corrupt and don't strike fear into the hearts of its citizens... occasional lapses of judgmental perhaps but not usually feared.
12 freedom to elect idiots to lead our variety of governments be they local provincial or federal. It's my choice.
13 a pretty decent beer can be found in most places.