Bring on the Holidays

Ahhh a week away from home all alone on the road. I've been to union meetings and have enjoyed the time on my own. RJ has been *home alone* and I have been texting her daily to ensure she is alive and well. She doesn't like being alone, but the little dog is there with her and The Beau is up the street even if she doesn't acknowledge his presence much.


I've been sending The Beau emails and he's been responding, but I do miss our daily chats. So this evening, instead of heading straight home, I'll be spending the night at his place and heading home on Saturday instead. A little snuggle time as well as decompression rather than heading straight home to whatever mess awaits me. RJ still isn't good enough at keeping the place tidied and I'm stymied as to how to deal with it.


The holiday preparation time is upon me and I've got a note for December 1 to pick up some new tree lights and tinsel for the tree instead of waiting until Dec2 20th when things are terribly picked over and when we usually trim the tree. I am not sure what we'll be doing for the holidays this year. There had been talking of heading home west, but the $2000 price tag for three of us to fly kills me. So we'll stay put. XSU is heading east and I am not sure if the girls want to go with him or not. I truly don't mind if they do. The Beau has told me we can spend Christmas with his family, but the girls are not keen. I don't mind that either.


We Beau and I - have a bunch of social engagements. Wow. We've already had two parties to go to, and have about three or four more. This part of being a couple has been more than fun. I'm enjoying it. Interestingly, I've been hanging out a lot with the neighbours, something I haven't had much chance to do in the past given XSU's non social temperament. More restructuring experiences. All good.


This social thing has taken some getting used to surprisingly. Being part of a real couple is still kinda new, and of course social engagements are part of the deal. I like it, and in fact I am reveling in it.


I have to plan my own big open house party, but I've decided it will wait until the February blues time, because, right now, I am just too busy!

On Exes and Passed on Partners...

I have been enjoying a lovely three day weekend. Ever since I started working a compressed work week - that is 9 loooooong days of 8 hours and 50 minutes equals every second Friday off - I have had a lot less feelings of stress and a whole lot more relaxation. I don't know why I didn't do this years ago.

The Beau and I are getting set for our vacation together. Not all fun though. I have one week at a union convention. My first. I'll see how I fit in with the activist crowd. It will be a civics lesson as well as a learning opportunity.

Week two entails the holiday part staying with my uncle and aunt and also visiting friends. The uncle is my mom's youngest brother. He's ten years ago, maybe 11 or 12 years younger than my mom. He's been married twice. My current aunt, his second wife is the same age as XSU. I have four cousins. Two by aunt #1 and two by aunt #2. My youngest cousin is in between my two girls in age. My oldest cousin is ten years younger than me. And I believe that my uncle is probably only a few years older than The Beau. Did I ever mention that The Beau is ten years older than me? The point here - with this cross of generations, it should be a good visit. The uncle can be a bit of a red neck but Beau can take care of himself and will be just fine.

The Beau had a barbecue of current and former neighbours this evening. One of the formers felt that Beau shouldn`t be seeing anyone. She seemed to be missing the passed on wife and felt some sort of loyalty towards her. Okay. I`m not trying to replace anyone or be something I am not. Apparently she had a lot to say on the subject until both Beau and one of the other neighbours who happens to know me, told her off a few months ago last time she was in town. All went well this evening. I met her this evening and she behaved, as did I. (seriously why wouldn`t I)

I occaisionally get weird vibes when Beau talks about his wife, but I don`t get too worried about it. She`s gone and can`t come back. I am me and he is good with that. And there is no competition or worry except about learning who we each other and how we are together.

Frankly with XSU around he`s probably got more to worry about than I do. Though I would NEVER entertain that notion. And if I ever do, any one has permission to smack me up the side of the head. Beau is pretty patient with my odd rant on whatever latest idiocy XSU has going on.

So this is the getting organized week. Big job - ensuring RJ doesn`t wreck my house while I am gone. I decided to ship the dog out to ensure he got attention as I just don`t trust that girl to look after him as well as I do.

Summer news blast - restructuring continues

Here we are half into July already. It’s been some great hot weather and I’ve been doing my best to enjoy it. Here we go with a few short items for your reading and perhaps commenting pleasure.

Rebel continues to enjoy her life with the Loser BF. She has had her ups and downs with that man and with her jobs. School is coming along sort of, if she could just figure out what it is she really wants to do. I don’t think she really knows herself yet. But Loser BF doesn’t really help in that regard.

Rebel Junior graduated from high school will be starting university in the Fall. While she wanted to go to Nova Scotia, the money isn’t there. She’ll do just fine at one of the two local universities. And she is becoming excited about starting, so that’s a good thing. She was not a very nice daughter during her graduation and prom activities. I wanted pictures and she tore off without letting me get any. I wasn’t impressed. Both Rebel and I let her know that her behaviour was selfish. Alas, 20 years down the road when she doesn’t have any memories of her grad – will be when she kicks her self and realizes what a brat she was. I expect to be around to hear her say it too!

XSU has left for the summer. He’s done east to the ancestral home. Why I have no idea. Both his parents died this spring – about 6-8 weeks apart I believe. I was able to attend the MIL’s funeral service. XSU turned up in blue jeans. Seriously. Thank goodness he’s not my problem any longer. Given that both parents are gone I am not sure why he needed to spend the entire summer away from home. There really isn’t much reason for him to be there except I guess he doesn’t have any friends here anyway so he may as well leave.

I am on the hook with both girls – Rebel needing a car once in a while as the LBF doesn’t own one – nothing changed there.

RJ works in an industrial part of town in a new shopping complex and I don’t like her taking the bus at night – too isolated, so evenings one of us would pick her up. Seems it’s my job for the summer.

XSU is apparently buying out two of his siblings and taking over the parental home. So it appears he’s spending more money on that house than the one he has here. BOTH need a ton of work, but again, I step away and just roll my eyes at his judgement. The good thing with him being gone is I am the one helping RJ with her university course selection and stuff – much better as XSU would send her off on some weird tangents while mine will only be half weird.

And speaking of weird! I’ve had dreams about XSU – while sleeping over at The Beau’s house. Not really sleeping over as with RJ at home I am not comfortable being out when she is at home. I have been known to wake up at 5:30 AM at my house and walk over to The Beau’s and crawl into bed with him for some….. time together shall see say. Yes I have a key. I fell asleep this past Sunday morning and had a bazillion weird short dreams which starred XSU. Don’t remember much about them except that when I woke up I was a tad freaked out. Hmmmm wonder what this means?

And speaking of The Beau, he’ll be joining me out west this August as I get through a week of union convention business then we move on to meet “the uncles” and a few friends. Should be a good time.

I’ve been missing Ukrainian camp again this year. I really should have just booked the “Shangri-La” cabin that was the cook’s domain and no children allowed party room and invited folks out to join me. Next summer. Most definitely on the plan. Funny how years of spending time in the same way is missed when it doesn’t happen.

There’s talk of living together. Though not yet. Not ready to go there at the moment. Spending time together while me sleeping in my own house, works for me for now.

Quiet and Content

It's been another lovely week. A bit of radio silence, but not as much as I had expected. This is the anniversary of VNN's wife's passing and I pretty much went out of the picture as VNN needed to be on his own and get through the time marker in his own way.

It has been a tough week for him, but we did managed to spend some time together - and have grown closer quite quickly. A surprise to both of us.

I met his closest friends this past Friday and still don't know if I passed muster or not. No reason why I shouldn't I guess but I have no clue how hard they took the wife's passing - it must be kind of odd to watch your friend move on. As it was, we left his friends, and went back to his place for a night cap, and by the time I got home it must have been after 2 AM.

Rebel had asked me for a drive first thing Saturday morning, so up I got on four hours sleep, and managed to get her where she needed to be. Then off I went to a friend's for brunch clear across the other side of the city from me.

I spent the afternoon puttering in the kitchen making a cassoulet. Now that was a project, but it seems to smell pretty delish, so I think this was a hit. I'm having our theatre group - the girls who go to theatre together - for dinner this week before our show, so that will be all done now.

My cousin called me around 7 ish and I chatted with her for about an hour filling her in on the latest on my life. I was so exhausted that after I hung up the phone, I just slid right down on the couch, snuggled under a blanket and fell asleep. I didn't wake up til around 4:30 AM, with kitchen lights on, food not put away in the kitchen after my creativity went awry on cassoulet. I clearly can't keep drinking three whiskys a night and work on four hours sleep.

VNN called today before heading out to his Super Bowl party with the lads to tell me he was all right, and would see me Tuesday. I of course, have a meeting on Monday after school, and am not free, much to the dismay of both of us.

I have to say, I am enjoying this new version of togetherness. We're still not quite "out there openly" but yet, while I was out with VNN on Friday I ran into some friends and didn't quite know how to introduce him. boyfriend? oy please - at my age?! friend? seems a little cold, companion? what? We're both kind of struggling with this one.

A nice quiet weekend, comfort, contentment, and figuring out the new relationship. It's all good.

Sunday Snippets

It's been a while. I am sorta back but have been feeling a tad lethargic the last few weeks. The blast of hot weather week before last didn't help and getting back into work mode this week. Totally not helping.

Rebel Junior wants to be at school by 8 AM. Every day. This is KILLING me. Have I mentioned that I am not really a morning person? But it's good for me to work towards this goal because it will allow me to change my work day too. It's that getting to bed with the lights out earlier in the evening and not staying up to watch Craig Ferguson or Jimmy Fallon. We managed to get out of the house once at 7:45 AM and the rest of the week it was 8ish... or later.... working on this one!

I found out that a really nice guy I work with, who I haven't seen in months is at home on hibernation leave. He came home from work one day and his wife had left him. Off she went to Newfoundland - with another man- and left him at home with the five dogs and some furniture. He had no clue. Nothing. Isn't that always the way with the men? Typical. He'd been married over 35 years and was getting the retirement plan geared up. He's been off work for over 4 months now. I've sent his manager a note telling him that when next he talks to this guy, that I'd like to take a crack at him. I think his wallowing phase needs to fade out and he needs to start getting angry and dealing with the business. The five dogs and his finances in particular. Apparently she's coming back to take two of the dogs. Nice of her.

We are still dealing with our Hotelby City.com fiasco. The company very nicely took off one night's charges at their inflated price. - I am still so pissed at this thing. But in the end if they don't back away, I am going to have to pay $400 extra in hotel charges to VISA. Hotelsbycity.com is part of Priceline and I can't seen HOW they can say cheaphotels on their site and then charge these extravagent fees.

I am still working on getting a beat up old couch out of my basement. RJ called XSU to come over and destroy it and get it up and out. I had a fit (quietly) when she told me. Apparently he was going to come in the house when he brought her home after school and take care of it. While that would be all fine and dandy, I was pissed that it never occured to him to call ME and ask ME what I wanted to do. RJ keeps using the argument "well it WAS dad's house too, until you two had to break things up." I didn't even bother going there with her, and told her instead that I had things under control and really, it was okay, and thanks for offering up her dad, but I have my own friends who will help me. No doubt this would have the easy way out, but frankly, I'm not too keen to be beholden to the XSU in any way, shape or form. He wasn't helpful while we were married, why would he be now? It's that thing he needs and I don't want to be feeding his needs. I couldn't do it right while we were married, why do it now? Perhaps it's biting off my nose to spite my face ( I love this phrase) but I need to figure these things out on my own with my own people.

I called XSU and told him that if either of the girls ask him to come into MY house for any reason, he absolutely had to call me or send me an email first. There's just no reason for him to be taking requests for stuff at my house from his daughters. He, as usual, said nothing. I don't know why he doesn't get this part. It's NOT his house. He really should focus on his house instead. It's postively a relic!

IN the meantime, I've got a friend coming over with a saw, wire cutters and just in case, a chain saw to get this piece of crap furniture chopped into sections and out the door.

Not a great Sunday activity, but it has to be done!

Happy week friends.

It's hot outside. Like seriously summer hot. But the new furnace kicked in and the old air conditioner seem to be working in tandem. I say a quiet thank you. But it's still a bit of a problem as the 2nd story is never as cool as the main floor and the basement is freezing. I have shut the registers on the main floor and hope to divert the air through the vents up to the second floor. I am not sure that the furnace fan is running as it should. This high efficiency thing might be so efficient it just quietly blows the air in and up without a lot of noise but the air coming through the vents is about as strong as a 90 year old blowing out birthday candles.

The ceiling fan is running. in the stair well to the second floor. I can never remember which direction it should be turning - clock or counter clockwise. Being the savvy researcher I am, you'd think I'd be able to do the search and figure this one out. I'm not there yet.

I am ensconced in the new recliner with a blanket on me in the basement watching General Hospital and surfing the web. I have already put the chicken into the fridge to marinate, made a fruit salad and done three loads of laundry. That's all the domesticity I can manage. Now I do need to get back upstairs and continue the de cluttering. I bought myself a recliner for my bedroom and I must absolutely get the crap out of my room so that the recliner looks nice up there. I can't have moving guys saying stuff like " lady? are you for real? you want us to put the chair where?"

Rebel's BF cleaned my house yesterday by vacuuming and getting the basement floor cleaned. I said thanks. I mean why not. He did a couple of other things around the house but only after he asked me. This has been the thing that annoyed me - he does stuff and does not ask. That really bugs me. It reminds me too much of XSU's behavior. I told Rebel this and made it clear that in MY house it would be done MY way. She of course doesn't get my point and probably won't until she actually has her own place.

Rebel's BF claimed he would clean my windows today. He brought his stuff and left it in the garage and sure enough today - he' never turned up. No surprise. Same ole behaviour . Something always comes up. Good thing I don't have any expectations of this man.

And I was told he has applied for a job here in town. Can you see me hitting my head on my screen? WHY won't he leave? Why? Why can't he just hop into his little 1996 Mustang and drive off into the sunset and disappear for a while?

It's a plot of some sorts I am quite sure of this. For some reason I must have annoyed the gods who send boyfriends to daughters and I need to find something to appease them. What would that be? If you know please do tell me so I can make my moves.

Easter Sunday Post Mortem & Easter Monday rabble rousing

I am feeling very superior today. I am NUMBER ONE! on the Bejeweled Leader Board in my circle of Facebook friends. I am 3,000 points shy of 400,000! The next nearest friend is at 301,760. For a very short time I will RULE. Then Tuesday - we start all over again. Bragging rights til then.

We had a lovely day yesterday. Rebel and I were at a friend's for Easter brunch. For once, I had a designated driver and was able to imbibe in the sparkling chardonnay with impunity. Yes. I lushed it. On Easter Sunday. It was a lovely way to spend mid day.

It was an all girl brunch. Veronica also invited another friend and daughter. This daughter works as a social worker, something our Rebel is interested in and the daughter was most encouraging and helpful in talking about her work and education with Rebel. Fantastic. She talked most positively about her career choice and why she loved it. Rebel listened quite intently.

During the evening, the BF showed up. Apparently he drank too much somewhere and Rebel didn't want him driving. He stayed the night and was supposed to be up for work this morning. I heard the alarm go off but I didn't hear him leave. Roll eyes. And at 2 PM when I returned from running errands, he was STILL in the house. WTF?! Like a bad penny that lad keeps turning up. Rebel has school today and left and the BF trailed out as well. He knows better than to remain in my presence. I really am quite the Witch with a BEE around that man. It just seems to come naturally - Easter good will feelings notwithstanding. But he pulled a fast one. Again.

Even though BF told Rebel the shop was closed and he didn't have to work, I thought I'd check out that story. I called the shop - after dialing *67 to block my number - no surprise no. 1 - They were open. I asked to speak with the BF and was told he wasn't in. I asked if he had been expected in and no surprise no. 2 - of course he was expected to work! The lad is gonna get his ass kicked - by the boss and by the Rebel.

Now, how to relay the lie to the girl without getting myself hurt in the process given the ole shoot the messenger problem?

Simple - I called XSU - told him the story. Let her shoot him instead.